By Joe

This is told from Skyeye’s POV. Paragraphs are separated by varying amounts of time. As you will find out, he’s a foul-mouthed little bugger.

I gotta get out of here. He–Vincent–is driving me insane, especially polishing his guns, and even *bleeping* talking to them! Just because he’s crazy doesn’t mean he has to make me go crazy too. I mean, sure I do the same thing with my my computer, but–never mind. You know what? I’m out of here, I need a breath of fresh air. I know, I’ll go over to the Starbucks near Dad’s house (and bring my cloaking device, of course–it wouldn’t do for people here to know I’m so much damn better than them), get a coffee or five.

Ahh, Starbucks. It’s amazing Dad doesn’t hang out here more, I mean, look! Tons of good coffee, free Wi-Fi (in case you haven’t heard, I recently bought some spare computer parts, so now my supercomputer’s a laptop, too), and a lot of hot chicks hang out here. No wonder the place is full of guys. I kinda feel sorry for them though, they’re no match against me. Then again, girls are more of Vincent’s area of expertise, so why should I care? Maybe I’ll just stay a while, get some tasty caffeine while working on that eternity code I recently thought up.

Just came back from the bathroom (sadly there are no implants that can eliminate the call of nature), saw one girl (extremely pretty, ahaha) typing like hell on her laptop. I’m surprised it hasn’t caught fire yet, in fact. Hang on a tick, was that my code she was working on there!? How the *bleeping* hell did she get it!? I’m going to have to talk to her about this, but I’d really rather not make a scene, so I guess I’ll just walk up to her or something. Relax, it’s not like I haven’t walked up to a girl I don’t know before and angrily accosted her. Oh, wait–I haven’t. *bleep*. This might take a while…

…No. No *bleeping* way. There is absolutely no *bleeping* way she came up with that code on her own! She doesn’t have cybernetic implants! She doesn’t look like a genius (seriously, she looks like she could be a model, except less anorexic)! It can’t be! At any rate, I showed her my computer, and you know what she said!? “Well, seems you can do my kind of stuff too. I had no idea anyone else could even conceive of an eternity code.” Oh, yeah!? Well, I’ll show you who’s the better coder!

I asked her if she wanted to spar with me, and get this–she agreed. Oh, this is gonna be fun, she doesn’t know about the weapons I’ve got stashed in my backpack.

She’s cheating, I swear. She had me flat on my back in five minutes, and she was only slightly panting. Yes, I did bring out the weapons (and left quite a few craters, but what matters is that the Starbucks people don’t know about it), but what follows is even more surprising–she has weapons, too, and she’s damned good at using them. This is so *bleeping* unfair. First she proves she’s at least as smart as me (any smarter and she’d have to have helium balloons attached to her head to keep her from collapsing from under its weight) and now she’s a better fighter than me too!? I gotta get to know her more, might be a useful person to know.

Okay, got some details about her (yes, I am sitting with her right now, thank you very much), but I’ll keep them to myself. I will let slip, though, that she’s just graduated in college, her favorite weapon’s the plasma rifle (“Elegant and extremely deadly,” she said) and she likes going to DQ too! She’s gotta be the most unusual person I’ve ever met, and I hate to say it, but…I think I’m falling for her. Yes, I know about that ‘love at first sight’ crap, but I never thought it would apply to me. Now, I feel as if the world’s just smacked me upside the head.

The weirdest thing just happened. Remember when I said I brought a cloaking device with me, to disguise my implants? Well, the worst possible thing happened: while I was drinking from my coffee, some of it spilled on the cloaker, and guess what–it shorted out. Crap. Now she’ll find out what I really am and be disgusted, right? Wrong. What she actually did was take a moment to look at me, and then smile maliciously at me. By this time, what was running through my head was ‘*bleep* *bleep* *bleep* *bleep*’ and so on. What she did though, was quite different: she pulled out a device that looked eerily similar to the one I had (I would have said it was mine if I wasn’t holding mine in my hand) and switched it ‘off’, revealing that she’s just like me–a cyborg. I could do nothing but stare at her, and after a while I realized my jaw had dropped to the floor. As I rushed to pick it up, she laughed, and let me tell you: she has the most beautiful laugh I’ve ever heard–wait, did I just say that!? *bleep*, I think Vincent’s rubbing off on me. Still, I take back nothing.

*A few minutes later, back to my POV*

The door opened, and Vincent looked up. What he saw was surprising: Skyeye, as he expected, but with a most unusual expression on his face, a mixture of bewilderment, idiocy and bliss, all at the same time. Skyeye took no notice of this, and merely walked to his bed and fell asleep. A little later, contented humming sounds could be heard.

Vincent then decided to do a little investigation. He had spent enough time using Skyeye’s computer (though not when Skyeye was there, of course–he’d be mortified if he got caught), and so it was a simple matter to connect Skyeye’s robotic eye to the computer, and view what Skyeye had been out doing that day. It didn’t take long before his jaw dropped as well, in the exact same fashion as Skyeye’s did earlier.

When Skyeye woke up, the first thing he saw was Vincent grinning nastily at him. From experience, he knew it meant nothing good for him, and it usually meant Vincent had played a nasty prank on him. This time, though, he was just grinning. Then Vincent held up a cable that was connected to the computer. He was about to let out a cry of anger when he realized, with a pang of horror and embarrassment, that the other end was connected to his eye.

As soon as he saw this, Vincent said, “Really, Skyeye–it’s not chivalrous to challenge a girl to a sparring match.”

Skyeye retorted, “So what? She beat me, so it doesn’t really matter”–but then he quickly clamped his mouth shut, even more mortified.

Vincent kept on grinning and said, “I see you have a girlfriend now.” He then started laughing, and with every laugh Skyeye grew redder.

Skyeye knew he was–to put it simply–dead, and so he kept quiet, knowing that Vincent had nearly unlimited power over him now. All he could do was mutter to himself, “Aw, nuts”.

What do you people think?


2 Responses to “Why Vincent’s Currently In Charge”

  1. September 2, 2007 at 11:50 pm

    I think Skyeye has a girlfriend =)) BWAHAHAHAHAHAH >:))

    Uh… It reminds me of something… nvm…

    And I like how Skyeye writes =))


    Vincent’s MEAN D:

  2. 2 Joe
    September 3, 2007 at 7:03 pm

    1. not yet, but we’ll see, it could happen. XD

    2. pray tell. 😛

    3. i know, so do i. i like how he talks like he owns everyone else. XD

    4. hehehehehe to you too 😛

    5. it’s just that skyeye’s usually the mean one, so this is how vincent got back at skyeye. XD

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Presenting the thoughts and travails of a teenage writer who lives under a rock--albeit a rock with Internet access. Also, videos! Also, my Tumblr.


  • 33,146 frags

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"For just this once, can we pretend it's you and me?" -Thinking Of You by Test Your Reflex

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Check the pages every month or so (Egos, Fiction, Musings, Origins), I usually add stuff little by little (with the possible exception of Fiction, which really depends). Oh, and credits to Joaq for the header image.

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